Woman's Day Special - 2

Behind Those Legs, Is a Woman

Click. Click. Click.  Heels make such an undeniable sound as they tap against the polished granite floor of the airport.  And two beautiful legs in stockings grow out of these heels, meeting the edge of a miniskirt which flirts with the eyes of every man present.  Air hostesses - I wonder who came up with this beautiful idea!  

The very presence of these women brightens up an otherwise boring, mundane wait at the airport with nothing to do.  Dressed in colourful elegance they strut around the place, attracting wide eyed looks.  Their make up is so perfect, you could click a photo of any of them on any day and directly use it for a Loreal colour cosmetic advertisement.  And those legs in miniskirts and stockings, and the heels - those are the culmination of a voyeur's delight.

Last week I was traveling to Mumbai.  As usual, I had a one-and-a-half-hour mundane wait at the airport.  And as usual, it was time to watch the pairs of legs play peek-a-boo from behind the stockings.  Suddenly, one of them slipped and fell.  And in pain - She Screamed !  I jolted out of my semi-consciousness and my widened eyes focused as I came back to my senses.  She had screamed!!  

Yes, she was a woman.  She was human.  When she fell, it hurt her just like it would hurt me.  Airhostess - woman - human ?  Funny, I realised that connection didn't strongly exist in my brain.

Some staff came running to help her.  She wasn't badly hurt, just sprained her ankle lightly.  They helped her limp to the office to give her some first aid.  In a few minutes, she was back in business - still limping a bit, but back in business - and headed towards the security check.

With the commotion over and the queue for a boarding pass lessened, I walked over to get mine (I hate those queues and avoid the long ones whenever possible, especially on short journeys where I don't care what seat I get).  The computer system stalled right when it was my turn, so I chatted up the airline attendant at the counter.  I told Akangshaa that she had a nice name and asked her what part of India was she from and what inspired her to join an airline company.  

Akangshaa is from a town near Delhi.  Her father was holding a clerical position in a government organisation, and her mother does part-time tailoring to support the family.  The family wanted her to be on her own and so her father took a loan to fund an expensive course which leads to a career in airlines.  She worked very hard and was found it hard to accustom to the new rituals of mannerisms, etiquettes and taking on a dolled-up look.  She worked hard and was one of the lucky ones who actually got a placement, as most girls and boys in her batch could not secure a job with any airline even after paying hefty course fees.  She dreamed of flying as no one in her family had ever flown in an airplane.  But she could only secure a ground staff position and hopes to be able to become a cabin crew sometime in her life.  With passing time, it might not be possible for her to do that.  But she is atleast happy to work with a reputed company, have a respectable job, and even though she has to stay away from her family and work odd hours, she is able to support her family back home.  

Blink!  The computer system blinked back to life.  My boarding pass was processed and my luggage transferred into oblivion through a conveyor belt.  My security check had been announced so I went there directly and got myself a metal detector check that proved I wasn't a terrorist or didn't have any plans of blowing up or hijacking a plane.  That morning as I waited in the lounge, I heard a lot of heels click and a saw a lot of shapely legs play peek-a-boo through the stockings.

But my mind wasn't on that anymore.  Akangshaa had distracted me.  The heels and stockings contained the aspirations of a woman I had usually missed - a woman with dreams like any other, ambitious and hard working, toiling at odd hours and staying away from her family for days at length.  The glamour hides the turmoils of her heart, the mascara hides the sigh in her eyes, the clicking heels hide the whisper of her desires.  Dealing with tons of obnoxious self-centered travelers everyday, she hides her scorn with a plastered smile and greets everyone with grace.

That morning in the airport departure lounge, my mind drifted from the heels, stockings and the miniskirts.  I had a new realisation running through me.  Behind each pair of legs, was a woman.

Women's Day Special - 1

Why I Don't Celebrate Women's Day

"You didn't wish me on Women's Day!!"  She was shouting, almost scolding me.  It was about 8 PM on 8th March, celebrated world wide as women's day. I hadn't wished her.  And that did set me wondering.

 

Why, why at all hadn't I wished her?  I knew it was women's day.  The newspapers, the radio and the billboards all across town had been screaming it into my ears since so many days.  There were conferences happening all over town to celebrate women's day.  From felicitation functions to morchas against domestic violence, woman's day was in-your-face.  So then, why had I not wished her - a Happy Women's Day? 

 

I thought and I thought, and I concluded this:  There Is No Celebration Happening Here!

For Heaven's sake, Women's Day is no celebration.  If at all it is an event, it is a mourning event.  Why?? Well, this is going to be kinda tough to explain, but I'll try.

 

Let me try to make a point using a negative stance. 

 

Why don't we celebrate men's day?  Simply because, we believe that men enjoy their rightful place in the society and there is no need to designate a special day in the calendar when we need to bring the focus to "men's issues".  Conclusively, women must not have yet obtained their rightful place in the society and that is the reason why we need to designate a special day for them.  On this day, women's issues are brought to the world's attention - issues of domestic violence, issues of inequality, issues of gender discrimination.

 

So what makes you think that it is a cause for celebration?  To acknowledge that we still need a "Women's Day", is to acknowledge that women have yet to obtain their rightful place in the society.  The day of a beautiful equality is yet to come.  It's a horizon we yet need to conquer.  A day when a woman is not discriminated against just because she is a woman; and that she is celebrated in her multiple roles - a mother, a sister, a daughter, a wife and a daughter-in-law.  A day when the role of the feminine is accepted to be as important as the role of the masculine.  A day when  compassion is considered equal to strength. 

 

That, my friends, will be a day of celebration, a day I'll gladly wish her.  For now, the very existence of women's day, is a cause for mourning.  And I refuse to wish any woman, a "Happy Woman's Day".

Beware: Childhood Values Die Hard

LESSONS FROM A SALT SPRINKLER

Today, I was waiting by the roadside when my eyes fell on a little kid. He seemed to be doing something. It was dusk and the light wasn't too bright, so I leaned in with narrowed eyes to make out what he was upto. He was sprinkling salt all over with a salt sprayer!

Seemingly, his parents had taken him along to a little streetside cafe. They were sitting at a table waiting for their food to come, while the little kid had picked up the salt sprayer and was sprinkling salt all over.

Now, kids are always upto such antics. But this one deserves a mention because his parents dumbly were watching him do it. No reprimanding him, no asking him not to do it... not realizing they are setting themselves up for raising a kid who probably will never become a valuable citizen.

I may sound too far fetched, but this little act of theirs is basically a signal to their kid that anything that belongs to another, need not be valued. Salt is dirt cheap, but for the kid there is no difference between salt, clothes, watches or diamonds. He is learning a dangerous lesson.

If the same thing were happening at home, would the mom and dad be so totally quiet? Would they let him sprinkle all the salt they have purchased just for play? If they wouldn't let him do that at home, why let him do that at a restaurant? Just because the salt is not chargeable?

Silly people! I presume, that they let him act the same anywhere. As long as it is not ours, son, and we won't have to pay for misuse or damage, go ahead and spoil it. This little kid might grow up to violate traffic rules, throw garbage on the streets, care a damn about the environment and have no vigor to defend a cause. He might just end up as another useless citizen like the hordes of them we already hoard, that fail to think beyond the boundary of their own home and self. Values sown in childhood go a long way. But who is going to instill them?

Not school. School is just for developing scholastic skills. They will teach them to measure the distance between Earth and Jupiter, but not teach how to measure the impact of them garbage on the streets. Not TV. TV will teach them how to run behind hollow beautiful exteriors and lower one's self esteem, and not teach how to look beyond the obvious and feel better internally. Not religion. Religion will teach them how to chant prayers and pray for miracles, and not teach them how to go out and take charge of their own destiny. So it is left to the parents to instill some values, and they too are backing off in this case. And I can be sure this is not an isolated case. Tons of parents are backing off. They spend thousands on scholastic skills, and not a penny or minute on life values.

The society needs better citizens. It is upto the parents to make sure they instill the right values in their kids. Or we will collectively, pay the price - That of a society of self contained individuals who only drain from the collective but never contribute.

Flirt Fine and Pay the Fine!

"In some places, flirting is illegal. In Little Rock, AK, an antiquated law is still on the books warning that engaging in playful banter may result in a 30-day jail term. In New York City, another outdated law mandates that men may be fined $25 for gazing lasciviously at a female; a second conviction stipulates the offender wear a pair of blinders whenever he goes out for a walk."

Huh?  Interesting, isn't it??

So next time in that Karan Johar movie, he better take care when Shah Rukh latches at a girl in NY, he could end up paying $25 as a fine and end up wearing blinders!!!  :)

Some archaic laws just exist for the sake of existing, and in a way I'm glad they aren't done away with.  They provide so much humour in our daily humdrum life. 

A (Stray Indian) Dog's Life

This is a scene of somewhere close to my house in Ahmedabad (Gujarat), India.  "Street Dogs" are an interesting concept in India.  They are stray dogs who no one owns, and they live on the street.  They mark their own neighborhoods and are usually fed lazy by the residents.  Usually harmless, these dogs provide a funny addition to the city landscape.  The only difficult moments arise when some berserk dog tries to attack the people, and that one is then rounded off by the municipality.

These dogs are lazing around on the sand in the winter sun.  Totally impervious to the road they lie in peace, basking themselves to glory.  

I recollect discussions I've had with friends in the USA when I used to live there, and it was almost impossible for me to explain what stray / street dogs are.  The concept of having dogs owned by nobody was totally alien to them.  But to me, its a way of life. 

So well, this is a Dog's Life in India. Any takers???  

If you're interested, you can write to one of these dogs at stray.peanuts@indianstraydogs.com :)

Eastern Open-mindedness Vs. Western Narrow-mindedness

This is a conversation between my friend (who's settled in the US now) and I, at a restaurant in India:

Me: I wanna use the washroom

He: Me too

Me: Let's go find where it is

(We walk around, ask a couple of waiters and reach the washroom.  Its just one wooden door.  I open and walk inside)

Me (to He): Oh, there are two commodes here.  Come in.

He (reluctantly): Well..

Me: What well? There are two commodes here, we can both relieve ourselves.

He (walks in with reluctance): Okay

(After completing the task, we walk out.)

He (Smiling now): I could never do this in the USA!

Me (I've lived in the US too): I know, they'd all think you and I are gay

He: Yea!

Me (Laughing)

He (Laughing)

No but really, the west is so narrow-minded.  All the Americans can think of between two persons is the possibility of a sexual relationship or no relationship at all.  This is ridiculous.

In Hindi-Urdu combine, we must have more than a score of words to describe different types of love.  The makers of English language chose to give it poverty in this context.  There is only one majorly used word for love – love itself.

I was discussing with a Jewish friend of mine, who had gone to a family wedding in NY and had fun dancing with all the guys without anyone concerned about 'queerdom'.  He had felt sheer joy in having fun without the worries of being misjudged or misconceived.

In the east, we have a lot of fun together (again, this statement if made in the USA would refer to sexual fun – there is no other form of fun left anymore).  It's about friendship, about bonding (oops! Bonding is another word one should avoid or be branded as queer).  A touch from a friend goes a long way in making life warmer, better, secure.

During my first days in the US, I was told that it is almost a sin for two guys to put their arms on each other shoulders while hanging out, or even patting on the back!  Now, if two guys are holding hands and walking, that could raise an eyebrow.  But patting the back or putting your arm around a shoulder – these are basic gestures of human warmth.  No wonder the west is full of cold people longing for a touch of human warmth... and it's not a touch on the body I am talking about, it's a touch on the heart.  A touch that secures, a touch that conveys – I am there for you. 

It's gone missing.  Everyone's become so narrow-minded.  In such times, I love my east.

The Poor Li’l Fidgeting Indian Bride

It's so funny to see the Indian bride on her wedding day and the wedding reception day (the party for all people post-wedding).  She is all decked up in her best clothes and jewelry.  But behold!  This has made her so extremely uncomfortable.  You see, girls aren't really used to wearing this much anymore.  Watching her trying to balance her heavily embroidered saree is really a funny sight, unparrelled even by comedy cinema.  The poor thing keeps a straight face, and constantly smiles at the sea of endless visitors, while on the other hand constantly fidgeting with her clothes and jewelry or asking her friends for help.

But hey, it's her wedding day. It's so special. Isn't she supposed to look her best?  I dunno. You answer that for yourself.  If you really ask yourself you'll come across these questions - look her best for whom? For what? It's a special day but why does special have to be so uncomfortable?   Why are we so busy appeasing the "society" most of the time, that we forget the most important fact: finally, its we who should be having the most fun.

The poor Indian bride.  In her effort to look her best and win accolades for her looks (that is all girls are judged on in weddings anyways; who, including all the other women too, cares for her character, her attitude or her ability to make a good wife), compromises on the basic sartorial comfort that would have let her enjoy her wedding in totality.  

Kaun, kise?

This is me talking to a lighted cigarette as the fire singes it downwards:

Tu Mujhe Peeti Hai..
Ki Mein Tujhe Peeta Hun?

Ye Kaisi Kashmkash Mein, Mei Rehta Hun..

Zindagi Mujhe Jeeti Hai..
Ya Mein Zindagi Jeeta Hun;

Ye Kaise Kashmkash Mein Mei Rehta Hun.

English Translation:

Do You Smoke Me..
Or Do I Smoke You?

In This Confusion, I Live..

Do You Live Me Life..
Or Do I Live You;

In This Confusion, I Live..

Invasion of the Metal Trees

Yuck! Its a disgrace!! And worse still, people actually think they look good!!! Stupid ugly looking metal tree fountains adorn the cityscape in Ahmedabad.

These metal creatures are awful. A repulsive white stem rises lifelessly into the sky and numerous hideous stems butt out in all directions from the top of the stem. I'll be modest here to confess that the fountain doesn't look so bad at night when the water is flowing from it. But most of the day, the fountain is switched off. And even when it is switched on, the sight is nothing compared to the extremely beautiful fountains that exist all over the world.

And our municipality seems to have fallen in love with these trees. They are sprouting all over - parks, cross roads, even government offices. The restaurants and hotels also seem to have taken fancy to them and have garnished their properties with them. We are running out of the brown and green trees, and are planting lifeless ugly beings instead.

Why shall we here in Ahmedabad, always end up preferring the low taste items? Why shall we always keep ourselves away from beautiful appreciable monuments?

Will we never believe; We are worthy of better?

Too Good ??

I realise that sometimes, unhappiness is simply the lack of problems in life. When not faced by something really challenging, there is nothing fulfilling at the end of the tunnel. The tunnel, many times, seems more fun than open skies i guess.

I am chatting with a friend and all she can do is give me 2 to 4 letter words - okay, fine, ya, will do. She has a good life really - good parents, good family, good job, good pay, good car. And i guess, thats what her problem is too. Its all just to good! Good feels good only as the light at the end of the tunnel. Once under the open skies for long, the wind loses its charm, the blue sky looks like nothing special, and the ride seems too boring.

Lets go seek a tunnel to conquer!